I DO IT ALL WITH A SMILE

TODAY'S FEATURED AUDIO COMEDY:

"I DO IT ALL WITH A SMILE" Is a song about 'hope' and 'change'. Just kidding, this is a short song by ME about staying positive while examining a short list of all the negative things that life and aging can bring!

Tyra Banks: "I'm Jealous Of Oprah". Oprah: "No Shit!"

By Benjamin Wally Carrico


When ex-model and alleged talk show host, Tyra Banks is not courageously fighting her phobia of Flipper she likes to talk about herself a lot, pretend to be the protege of Oprah Winfrey and submit herself to 'embarrasing' lie detector tests.
On a recent episode of her show, Tyra was hooked up to a lie detector machine and asked a series of questions that Tyra had chosen herself including the question "are you jealous of Oprah?". Tyra enthisiastically anwered "No, I am not jealous of Oprah!" Of course, Tyra failed the lie detector test witch came to the surprise of....er....no one! It is common knowledge in Hollwood that Tyra believes that she will be Oprah Winfrey's replacement when Oprah moves to her moon base/colony in the fall of 2012 but the Oprah camp denies these rumors. Tyra is allegedly jealous of everything about Oprah including Oprah's money, Oprah's house and Oprah's buttocks celulite.
Oprah says that she doesn't know anyone named Tyra .

Octomom Snags New House To The Delight Of Old Neighbors, To The Horror Of New Neighbors

By Benjamin Wally Carrico



Famous pregnancy addict and Angelina Jolie look-a-like contest winner, Octomom has bought a new house in Los Angeles to the exuberant delight of her old neighbors. Octomom, AKA Nadya Suleman will be moving into a home in the La Habrah neighborhood of LA, next door to several homes that instantly lost 50% of their value since the purchase was fianlized. Although her new neighbors have already begun to cry uncontrolably, her OLD neighbors have been seen throwing wild block parties and dancing in the streets until dawn. One of her old neighbors, Jack Mcmanus says that the news of the move is the best thing that has ever happened to him. "I prayed to God for this moment...many times....many, many times". Another Old Neighbor, Sally Burnside, says that the news of Octomom's move has been a blessing "My home's value has tripled, the grass is growing again, our pet poodle no longer runs around in cirlcles and my premature menopause has reversed itself...a blessing".
While her old neighbors are doing back flips and regaining their libidos, her new neighbors seem to be fastly sinking into depression. "We are all going to kill oursleves..." Says new neighbor, Bob Mung. "The entire street has made a suicide pact....the thought of suicide by any means neccesary is the only answer...the thought of living next to...that....woman...is too much for us, it's just too damn much".
Octomoms Father alegedly purchased the house for his daughter.